


Till the end.

by ifyou



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Boys Kissing, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Fíli, Jealousy, Kissing, Laketown, M/M, Misunderstandings, One Shot, Sibling Incest, Spoilers for Desolation of Smaug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-30
Updated: 2013-12-30
Packaged: 2018-01-06 18:13:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1110014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifyou/pseuds/ifyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fili feels his heart breaking at the thought of losing Kili to someone else.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Till the end.

**Author's Note:**

> This has been sitting on my tablet since I first saw The Desolation of Smaug and thought I'd finally post it. 
> 
> Let me know what you think. 
> 
> Any mistakes found are mine.

Fili watched as the wood elves appeared from nowhere and surrounded them while killing off the remaining spiders that were still trying to attack.

Somewhere amongst it all Fili had lost sight of his brother then there was a shout and Fili's heart stopped for a spilt second. He knew that shout, would know that voice anywhere. 

"Kili!" He shouted before he was shoved into the circle with the rest of the company, his panic taking over as he fought to run after the sound of Kili's shouts.

He should be there protecting his brother, saving him. 

When an elf started searching him and pulling out his daggers and throwing knives from all his hiding places, he let it happen with a sigh knowing there was no point in fighting. 

Kili soon appeared being led by a female elf with dark auburn hair, Fili breathed a sigh of relief as he looked at his younger brother alive and well. He didn't even have time to say anything to him before they were being led through the dark forest that was Mirkwood. 

Twice he tried to catch Kili's hand or even his gaze but his brother was in a dream, gazing at something that was far away in his thoughts. 

Fili wondered if he had went into shock.

Being shoved roughly inside his cell but not before his last weapon was found, Fili watched as Kili was walked past his cell by the same elf. 

He listened as Kili flirted with her and felt a pain in his chest, Fili threw himself against the bars with all his force trying to find a way out but it was useless just like Balin said. 

Sliding down the wall Fili stared out of his cell wishing that he could be beside his brother, the pain in his chest grew as he thought about their time on this stupid quest. 

The journey to Bagend and how easy their laughter was, how Kili would cuddle into him while they slept, their kisses every morning and night while on the road with the company. The fear he felt on the mountain side when the rocks split and he was taken away from Kili, the fear of dying and leaving his brother alone. 

The way Kili clung to him and begged Fili to show him that he was really alive. Then the goblins and the pale orc, the running from wargs and spending the night together quietly in the skinchangers house. 

Now as he sat there while it felt like his heart was breaking, listening as the she-elf returned and as Kili spoke of the promise they both made to their mum. 

He had a similar stone that he kept on him but for Kili to tell the elf about Dis made Fili furious, then the elf talked about stars while Kili laped it all up, Fili placed a hand over his mouth to stop the scream that was building inside him. 

What was he doing?

He noticed through the bars of his cell that the elven prince was watching the exchange between his brother and the elf with a scowl on his soft features and a hard look in his blue eyes. 

At least someone else doesn't like what their seeing Fili thought, blocking out his brothers voice for the first time in his life. 

When Bilbo rescues them all from their cells Fili is out and waiting for his brother, when Kili places his hand on his arm to push him forward he tries not to jump at the contact. 

The barrels smell like apples and after a while it makes him feel ill, not to mention the rapids in the water and being bounced around. Fili makes sure he's beside Kili the whole way, when the orcs are on either side of the banks trying to kill them and Fili wonders when they'll ever catch a break. 

Then their stuck and Fili can see the elves fighting the orcs but it looks like a losing battle, while their suck floating in the water fighting off orcs that are catching up on them Fili catches sight of his reckless younger brother who decides to try and pull down the lever to open the gates again. 

Fili watches as Kili climbs the stone steps fighting the orcs in his way throwing a daggers Fili kills an orc who is at Kili's back ready to stab him , he's almost there when Fili hears a wosh and then Kili stops, pain flashing across his face before he falls with a groan. 

"Kili!" He shouts cursing that he's stuck inside a blasted barrel, then an orc appears above his brother and Fili has an image of Kili dying. Of an empty word. 

The orc drops dead and he watches from his spot as Kili pulls himself up then pulls the lever down before jumping back into his barrel with a cry. 

"Kili" He calls again as he sees the pain clear on his brothers face and how pale he looks, as the arrow snaps off then their tumbling through the water again. 

Finally they reach the end of the river and before he can help his brother up, he's already sitting down pain clear on his face as he tells Bofur he's fine but Fili knows his brother better. 

_He comes up beside him and starts to bind his leg while his brother grips onto Fili's leg, the only sign that he's in pain._

"You have two minutes" their Uncle says looking at them with a frown, Fili helps him to stand and lets his brother put all his weight against him as they walk over to Bard. 

At Laketown Fili is even more worried, his brother is pale, an almost grey colour but still he stands and pushes Fili's hands away. 

"Kili, I'm tying to help" Fili says while their sitting beside each other in Bard's small house, everyone else is still warming up from being in a freezing lake then being covered with fish. 

"I'm fine, its nothing" Kili tells him a frown on his face. 

"You'd tell me though? If something was wrong you would tell me?" Fili asked looking into his brothers deep brown eyes, knowing that his showed the worry he felt. 

"Of course Fee" Kili said placing a cold hand on his cheek before looking away again, a far away look in his brown eyes. 

The pain in Fili's chest was getting worse, he could feel his brother moving away from him, that he was losing him. 

Their all ready to leave Laketown -well apart from Bofur who was Durin knows where- when his uncle tells Kili to stay. He sees the disbelief, the pain and horror in his brothers face as he tries to push his way onto the boat beside Fili. 

"join us when you're rested" He hears the end of what his Uncle is saying, Kili steps back and sits down a horrible look of shame on his face as Oin joins him giving up his place in the company. 

Fili begs his Uncle with everything he has to let Kili come with them, he brings up their childhood and the stories they heard but when his Uncle tells him he will understand when he's king Fili knows something is wrong. 

"Fili don't be a fool, you belong with the company" Thorin says catching his arm as he steps off the boat, while Fili looks at his sick brother. 

Fili pulls his arm away before staring hard at his Uncle  
"I belong with my brother" and Fili means every word. 

Even if it pains him to know that Kili might not feel the same, Fili will always love him and place Kili before anything else, even his future kingdom. 

"Fili go! You should be there" Kili protests as Fili kneels beside him and places a hand on his brothers back, shaking his head. 

"If you weren't there beside me when we see that mountain then I would never forgive myself. Kee I wouldn't leave you behind" Fili said quietly before Bofur decided to make his entrance and Fili shook his head at the dwarfs remark about missing the boat. 

Things went from bad to worse as Kili fell over in pain and Fili grabbed him just in time before he hit the dock, he carried his brother to Bard's who was about to send them away until he caught sight of Kili's deathly grey face. 

Fili felt hopeless as his brother, his baby brother lay on the bed screaming in pain and he could do nothing but hold him down and smooth back his sweat soaked hair. Bofur disappeared at some point to find a weed to bring down Kili's fever but all he could do was think about his promise. 

"Watch out for him Fili and promise that you will both come back home safe" their mum's voice rang inside his head and he wondered what she would do if she knew how little he could do now to save him. 

The screams broke Fili out of his daze, he turned to see orcs breaking through the door and roof. 

He cursed that he didn't have any weapons and that he couldn't protect Kili and Bard's children at the same time. 

Then the elven prince appeared along with the auburn haired she-elf who saved the day and killed off the rest of the orcs, Fili wouldn't deny that he was grateful for that but when the she-elf decided that she saw going to save his brother Fili nearly fell back. 

Holding down his brother as he screamed again and again while the elf- Tauriel- healed him with her magic, Fili didn't take his gaze off his younger brother who's fever filled eyes were staring at the elf like she was the most beautiful thing in the world. 

His heart gave a painful thud and he reverted his eyes not wanting to see anymore. Kili use to look at him like that. 

As Kili fell into an exhausted sleep he left him for a moment to grab a drink of water, Fili listening half heartedly as Oin babbled about elf magic but his eyes stayed fixed on his brother, his other half. 

When Kili wakes and whispers the elfs name Fili feels the pain in his chest return and it's like a knife stabbing into him over and over again. 

It takes everything in him not to cry as he listens to Kili confess his love to Tauriel and asking if she feels the same. Fili can't stand it, his heart is shattering with every word his brother says to the elf, every look that was once aimed at him now at someone else. 

He half runs outside and takes a shuddering breath, he wonders if this is what it feels like to have a broken heart, each breath painful and every memory of him and his brother together like a knife. 

"He's asking for you" Fili rubs his eyes once before turning to give Oin a small smile and a nod, he walks back inside slowly taking a look around to realise that Tauriel has disappeared, for now. 

Kili is looking at him with his chocolate eyes clear from fever and a small smile on his face, Fili takes painful steps towards his brother not wanting to know what he's going to say. 

"How are you feeling?" Fili asked, sitting down on the wooden chair beside the table while Kili turns his face towards him. 

"I've been better" Kili replies with a small smile and Fili returns it but he knows it's weak. All he can think of is his brother leaving him for Tauriel. 

"Fili? Is everything alright?" His brother asked looking at him with a worried expression on his tired face. 

"I'm just glad you're still here" Fili whispered taking the opportunity to take hold of Kili's hand and squeezing it lightly. 

"You can't get rid of me that easily" Kili joked but Fili didn't smile or laugh. 

Thinking about how easy it was for Kili to stop wanting him, one smile from the elf and his love was tripping over himself with affection for her. 

"You sure?" Fili asked looking at Kili who sat up with a wince before fixing his stare at him. 

"What are you talking about?" He asked looking confused and Fili wanted to cry all over again, he didn't even realise did he? 

"I'm talking about you!" Fili snapped and then looked over at their two fellow companions and the children but none were paying them any attention. 

"What about me? Fili what is it?" Kili asked taking hold of both his hands but all Fili could see was his brothers fingers touching Tauriel's hand. 

"You and that elf! You declaring your love for her while she healed you! You whispering her name and not mine when you woke up!" Fili said as his eyes blurred over again and he cursed himself for showing his true feelings. 

"Fili-" His brother started looking shocked but Fili talked over him. 

"Kili please don't. I love you and would die for you but I can't sit and watch my One fall in love with someone else. It hurts too much" He sighed as tears rolled down his cheeks and he didn't bother to wipe them away this time, knowing that there would be more to come no doubt. 

"Fili" Kili said reaching out to wipe away his tears and he let him, being selfish and wanting to feel Kili care about him one last time. 

Fili realised that this was the first time he had ever spoken of Kili being his One but the truth was he knew Kili was his from the minute he had first seen the small babe in his mothers arms. The first time he saw those dark eyes and messy tuff of brown hair. 

"What? Look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't love her" Fili demanded and when Kili's gaze fell from his face to the floor he felt his heart rip into two. 

"I can't because I do love her, but not the way you think I do. I love her like I love Bilbo, a friend. A good friend, nothing more!" Kili said loudly as he made Fili look at him, his face gaining it's colour. 

"But you were so struck by her" Fili whispered still not believing what his brother was saying that it was some cruel joke. 

"She is beautiful for an elf and is so different from the others but she is only a friend" They stayed quiet for a few minutes before Fili heard his brother talk again. 

"Fee. I love you with all my heart, there will only ever be you. Your my sun Fili, your my One" He said his voice filled with love as he cupped Fili's face in his hands and leaned forward so that their lips were almost touching. 

"I love you Kee" Fili breathed before he couldn't stand it anymore and pressed his lips against Kili's who kissed back just as eagerly. Slowly Fili felt his heart become whole again and full of love for Kili 

"I love you too and I'm sorry that I caused you so much pain my love" His brother said again kissing his lips softly once more and Fili smiled brightly. 

"I'm sorry too, for being an idiot" He said with a small laugh and loved the way his brothers eyes lit up. 

"Like usual, I'm tired. Come lay beside me?" Kili asked tugging on Fili's messy braids who slapped his hand away before crawling onto the small table and sat crossed legged before pulling Kili against him. 

He ran his fingers through his brothers mess of dark hair and felt more at home than he ever had, knowing that if he was ever taken from him Fili didn't know what he would do. 

"I was so scared, I didn't know what to do and you were dying while I sat there! I think if you died I would have joined you" Fili said after a while of silence, thinking that Kili had fallen asleep but really he was just enjoying being close to his older brother. 

"Shh Fee, don't talk about that. I'm okay, I'll be fine" Kili whispered 

"Promise me that we won't be separated again" Fili said as he rearranged himself so that he was lying on his side and Kili was curled into his chest they way he would when he was younger. 

"I promise Fili" Kili said looking at him with his deep chocolate eyes and Fili kissed his nose causing Kili to laugh for the first time in so long. 

The last time Fili had heard that laughter they were in Rivendell. 

"Good, now get some rest we have a long journey still to go" Fili whispered pressing a kiss to Kili's forehead as he felt his younger brothers breathing deepen as he drifted off into sleep. 

Fili felt his eyes begin to get heavy because now he could finally relax, Kili was alive and safe in his arms and he would always be his till the end. 


End file.
